


We'll Figure it Out

by StyrofoamSlashPlans



Series: That's just the way we learned [2]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Childhood Trauma, Coming Out, Could be read as platonic but trust me it's not, Eddie Kaspbrak has good friends, Eddie Kaspbrak is Bad at Feelings, Eddie is a hypocrite, Eddie is also scared, Eddie tries, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Love Confessions, Lucky for him Richie is fluent in dumb gay, M/M, Now get ready for..., Pining, Richie is gay and so is Eddie sorry I do make the rules here, Sonia Kaspbrak's A+ Parenting, Sort Of, You've seen Richie come out, eddie is confused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:41:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23434831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StyrofoamSlashPlans/pseuds/StyrofoamSlashPlans
Summary: After Richie came out to Eddie, things got better quickly, and they went back to the way they were. Richie was soon out to the whole club and after some time, everyone accepted it.Now, almost two years later, Eddie realizes that yeah, he is very much a hypocrite for some things said in the past.AKA: Coming out; Eddie style
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Series: That's just the way we learned [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1684489
Comments: 4
Kudos: 85





	We'll Figure it Out

This was a lot more stressful than he thought it would be. Not that he didn’t think it would be stressful in the first place but… Damn, this was stressful. 

He had already pre-decided that it would only be the losers club he told. As if there was any choice besides that. There’s no way in hell he could tell his mother. She’d have a heart attack, after all of her lectures about how ‘Homosexuality is a sin’. 

I mean, the loser’s club was accepting of Richie, weren’t they? They would be accepting of him too, wouldn’t they? But then again, Richie was a lot different from Eddie. Now that Eddie thought about it, it isn’t that hard to see Richie was gay before he even told him. He just had this way about him that if anyone looked close enough, it was pretty clear. It’s just that no one in this town ever takes the time to properly see Richie, all they see is his clothes, his gangliness, and his trashmouth, which is enough to make most people immediately want to look the other way. 

Eddie… Well, Eddie was different. He had been teased and bullied before, called a fag even. But that was exactly that, teasing, nobody really saw it, they just saw his crisp, clean clothes and neat haircut. They saw that his mother was probably one of the biggest homophobes in town. They saw a future in Eddie which he grew up, maybe got out of Derry, found a nice wife, and settled down with some boring office job. They didn’t see it in Eddie. 

He could easily hide it, but… 

There was something in him that just wanted it to be known, even if it could get him killed one day. 

He had actually started to figure it out a few weeks after Richie’s own coming out. He had never really had an interest in girls, then again he never really had an interest in anyone. He wasn’t even at the point where he fully understood what ‘having an interest’ fully entailed, because he never had. 

Then he started to actually think into it. When he did try to conjure something up in his mind, of a person that made him feel the way that people describe being in love feels, it ended up not being a girl. 

Yeah, it ended up being a boy, with a slender frame, dark hair, pasty skin that would be more unsightly to anyone else, and thick rimmed glasses, more specifically, trashmouth. 

Now don’t get him wrong, he didn’t take this as a sign that he liked Richie, although it very well might have been, he just took it as a sign that, okay yeah, maybe he isn’t as straight as he thought.

That didn’t stop him from trying though. For weeks, he tried to condition his mind to picture a girl instead, maybe the nice, blonde one in his class who always smiled at him, yeah that would be a good bet, but it didn’t work. Everytime he tried, his thoughts eventually shifted back to Richie. 

When he tried to think about girls smiling at him, his mind jumped to Richie’s stupid smirk that he did when he knew Eddie was trying not to laugh at something he said. It gave Eddie butterflies. 

When he tried to think of kissing girls, that was his last resort, maybe it would change if he thought of the actual romantic side of things. But even then, his thoughts still melted to those of his friend. 

He thought of Richie leaning down, he thought of his soft lips and how maybe, just maybe, he wanted to feel them, touch them. 

He had always stopped himself before he delved too far into his imagination, but it was always too late to stop the hot blush to flood his face.

He had tried so, so many times, to make it go away, to make these thoughts go away. They were wrong, weren’t they. They could get him killed, disowned, banished to hell, right?

But, it didn’t feel wrong, when he thought about Richie in those ways, it made him feel anxious, sure, nervous, yeah, but not bad. It was supposed to feel bad, right?

He was planning on telling someone, maybe Beverly, soon, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. Until he did. 

-

It had been a pretty hot day, it was nearing summer after all. So a few of the losers took refuge in the slightly cooler underground clubhouse. Yeah okay, Ben was a genius. 

It had just been Beverly and Richie at first, Beverly wanting to get out of the house but not wanting to deal with the heat, having run into Richie on the way here. Then only a few minutes later, Bill had showed up, wanting to get away from home because his parents were planning on having work friends over for a ‘get together’ because of the nice weather. 

When Eddie climbed down the ladder, Beverly and Bill were sitting side by side in chairs, talking about something that Eddie couldn’t really bring himself to care about. Richie was laying in the hammock, reading a comic and throwing in his input to their conversation from time to time. 

Eddie walked in and plopped himself in a chair, pushing his palms into his eyes. 

“Fuck.” He muttered a lot louder than he originally meant to. Beverly glanced over at him, as did Bill, Richie had already been focused on him since he walked in.

“What is it, Eddie?” Bev said, not really sounding all that concerned. It was a pretty common occurrence for Eddie to make an entrance such as this one. 

What Eddie had meant to say in return, was something along the lines of, ‘It’s so hot today,’ Or something that resembled that in a way at least, in which Richie would most likely respond with a joke while Bev and Bill just agree with him. That’s what he meant to say, what he meant to happen.

Instead, what fell out of his mouth was; 

“I’m gay.” It just kind of fell out like that, Eddie only realizing he had said it a few seconds late. He quickly pulled his hands away from his face and gasped at what he had let himself say. He flicked his eyes to his friends face only to see them all sporting the same dumbstruck expression. The first to speak was Beverly.

“Eddie… what?” Eddie just shook his head, seeming confused at himself even for having said it. 

“No… I didn’t…uh…” He stumbled for words as he tried to cover up what he had just said. But it had already been done, he said it loud and clear. 

“I’m not-” He cut himself off. If he just said it, he can’t deny it, it’s not like he can take it back. “Fuck.” He stated again, looking down. 

Everything was silent for a few moments as the group tried to process what was just said. As expected, Richie was the one to shatter the silence. 

“Shit bro, same.” Eddie sent a glare at Richie, pissed, mostly at himself, but glad someone at least broke the silence, it was killing him. No one really knew what to say. 

“Eddie...Are you?” Beverly said carefully. Not being able to bring himself to say anything, Eddie nodded slowly. There was more silence. Bill finally spoke for the first time since Eddie arrived. 

“Ih-I-I-...It’s- …” His stutter usually got worse in pressured situations, Eddie waited for him to finish. “It’s- It’s okay, Eddie. Of course it’s o-okay. It’s just so sudden…” Eddie nodded again, still not knowing what to say. Beverly agreed with Bill.

“Yeah, Eddie, of course we accept you, It’s just… How long…?” She tried to get a question out, having too many and not knowing how to ask them all, they all had questions of course. Eddie couldn’t bring himself to answer, he just shook his head quickly, still not looking up.  
Richie then stood up, drawing the others’ attention. 

“Yeah okay, Let’s go outside for a minute.” He said, looking at Eddie, which signalled the others that he was only talking to him. Not having much of a choice, Eddie stood up and followed Richie away and up the ladder outside. It was hard to walk, his legs felt like Jello and he could hear his heartbeat in his ears. When they were both outside, Richie closed the hatch of the clubhouse and walked over to a nearby tree, motioning for Eddie to sit too. 

Surprisingly, he did. Richie wasted no time.

“How long have you known, Eddie?” Richie said, a strange tenderness in his voice that was barely ever there. Eddie took some time to think, deciding he might as well answer. 

“Uh… About a year and a half…” Richie seemed slightly surprised by that. 

“That’s about the time that I… Are you sure Eds, completely sure?” Eddie just nodded, tears almost coming to his eyes. Richie nodded too, which didn’t really make sense, but Eddie wasn’t in any place to care at the moment. 

“Okay Eddie, okay, uh… Why...or, how did you find out?” The question was one that Eddie asked himself a lot too, he could never really figure it out, it always narrowed down to Richie though. Everytime he tried to think about how it started, it was Richie. So, being the dumbass he is, that’s what Eddie said.

“You.” He said quietly, hoping Richie didn’t understand what he meant. Richie looked confused and surprised. 

“Me? Why m… Ohh.” Something seemed to click in Richie’s head. ‘God, please don’t say it Richie.’ Eddie thought, looking down. 

“You… Did me coming out make you realize it?” Richie said instead. Okay, not what Eddie was expecting and certainly not the worst thing he could have realized. Well, maybe that was a part of it, Eddie thinks. Eddie considers nodding before shaking his head.

“Well, yeah… But that’s not what I meant.” He said, refusing to say anything more than that. 

“Well, uh, was it something I said that made you realize it..?” Richie said, clearly still confused. Eddie shakes his head, smiling a little at how ridiculous this all was. 

“It’s everything you’ve said.” Eddie paused for a moment. “And done.” Richie seemed to catch on at that. 

“Wait, do you…?” Hoping Richie meant what Eddie thought he meant, Eddie nodded slowly. 

Richie thought about that for a second, which gave Eddie time to panic. Oh god, what did he just say? Why did he say it? Just because Richie’s gay doesn’t mean he’d be alright with his best friend confessing to liking him.

“Eddie… Are you kidding?” He said. Eddie stayed silent, fearing Richie was angry now. “Because if this is just some joke, you went too far.” Richie said, sounding anxious. 

“It’s… no… It’s not a joke…” Eddie said quietly. Richie nodded, looking like he’s having a hard time processing it. 

“Okay.” Richie said finally. He turned to Eddie with his arms open. He wasn’t smiling but he had a warm expression on his face. 

Hesitating, Eddie slowly moved into Richie’s arms. When they embraced, he smiled. 

Yeah, he could definitely get used to this. They'd figure it out eventually, for now, he's fine just letting Richie hold him.

**Author's Note:**

> After I wrote one for Richie, I was like; Wait, what if...
> 
> And so here we are, hope you enjoyed! Make sure to comment, I love feedback


End file.
